i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Randomize
