My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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