i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
