Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
