just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Randomize
