id be glad to
I think my fart just growled at me.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize