So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
And then he peed in my hair
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