More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Randomize
