my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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