I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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