The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
false alarm, still single
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
