Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
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