I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
