Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
