i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
