hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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