it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Randomize
