I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
i think i have two assholes
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
