and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
