Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize
