let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
