You're so nebulous sometimes
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I had to cum in my sink.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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