if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I have grass duct taped all over my body
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
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