If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Randomize
