girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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