Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize