I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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