hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
