i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
you would pick up someone in the library
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Randomize
