Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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