you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Randomize
