so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
