Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
