even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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