Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
