So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
