fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Drake has all the answers
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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