After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize
