I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
