What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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