He asked me if I "almost moaned"
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
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