Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
My legs feel like baby dolphins
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
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