Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
is it fun? or sober?
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
