So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
