i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
