I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
