Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize