I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
