the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
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