No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize